that's what I am, that's how I feel
insane and weird
dementia sometimes visits..and she brings cookies
"God only knows why it's taking me so long..."
It's 10 AM and I'm on scotch, self prescribed, of course.
The dog is at my feet... he looks happy. I wish I was like that.
"walk that mile until the end starts...
nobody is perfect, trust me I've learned it"
so fucking tired of my life
I lie to myself with things like "life is great", "I'm a lucky bastard"
you know, a couple of years ago I had it all
now, I have nothing besides...memories
I remember being strong
I recall being fearless and loving
an angel told me the other day "what you need is a long time project, something you can put your energy on"
touched by God, that Rabbit guy...love him
I can't seem to find God at the end of the bottle
nor at the top
Starting to get numb
Surrounded by angels diguised as human beings
and all I can think of
is getting to taste the flavour of a bullet.
what's on the other side?